last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I enjoy the company of your penis
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