just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
