They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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