Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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