Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
