nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
