you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
