I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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