I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
