Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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