clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
