btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
