I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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