I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
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