Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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