Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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