I will die if light touches me.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
