he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
