Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
