Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
