You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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