Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize