Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize