If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
