i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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