u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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