My nipple is on Facebook.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
