I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
