I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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