He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
