Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
