just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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