I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize