Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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