please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
