But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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