i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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