it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
