the condom got lost in my hair
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
