I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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