is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize