so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
