dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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