Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize
