Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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