No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
