you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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