for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
