When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
