Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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