my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
