finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
